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Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Liberating Love

I am free
Unrestricted
Just able to be
Me
At all cost
And you love it
Even all the faults
So
Lucky I am
To have
The ideal man
In love with free
Just as much as he is in love with me
And we meet
In the middle
To breathe
So
Each exhale
Deems peace
Loving
Every
Liberated part
Of you...
With hopes of enduring
This love
For eternity

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

A Poem A Day - Light As A Feather

I come down soft
Tickling the skin
Stroking that hair that causes you to grin
Now smiling you
Make way for the new
Possibilities
You are eager
About
The new
Opportunities
And we are limitless
Exploring new abilities
And
I can't wait to see
Which hair you stroke
Or which part the skin you will tickle
Because if joy comes in this form
It is sure to linger
A few extra minutes
Before it hits the gound
So for now
I don't want my smile
To tell the story
Of what I've been through
I just want to show
The place you take me too

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

A to Z Challenge on AUDRIWRITES BLOG NOW!!!


A to Z Challenge - 30 Days of Comic Relief
So if you know me at all I am definitely pushing myself outside of my comfort zone by writing about comedy in general.  Although I consider myself to be somewhat funny, more of a sarcastic funny really, but I am definitely going to try and thoroughly examine what contributes to a successful comedy.  
For all that are familiar with the with A to Z Challenge don’t judge me I am a rookie.  And for those who are unfamiliar with the Challenge basically I will be posting each day with a letter from A to Z (starting with A) being the topic for the post of that day.   If that doesn’t define the challenge thorough enough for you please feel free to click the link below:
Hope you all enjoy!  
One Love,
Audreyanna

Monday, April 2, 2012

Nothing Left To Give

Hope is in the yearning
Never loosing sight of life's purpose
Having faith in the outcome
Loving until you have nothing
Left to give
That is free
Something that cost nothing
Can get you everything
If you think about it
Find that light
That speaks to your heart
And listen with ears
That navigate the soul
Purpose
Remember
Hope is in the yearning
Never loose sight of life's purpose
Have faith in the outcome
And love until you have nothing
Left
To
Give
just when I gave up on
the possibility
God showed me a new light
a new right
a favor so great
I could only hope for
an ounce of faith
and I did

the birth of great success
great motivation
a new determination
to be better
to be wiser
to work harder
and I thank you
because I almost gave up
and
now
I can't even sip from the cup
it overflows...

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

My Heart On Canvas

shocked at how the paint
turned to words
as the colors splattered the emotions of you
on the canvas
so pissed off
so confused
so torn
in search of the truth
you leave a question mark
you break my heart
and with one motion
one word
you mend it
but
I can't wait for it
I have to go
I built a brick wall
no turning back
can't see you
I am through
no questions now
my heart
has left you...

Monday, March 19, 2012

On...

I am going
on...
as far away from here as I can
because
I choose not to let lies win
I choose not to
allow assumptions in
I am going
on...
right to his desires
where his love is strong
where a man knows how to identify
when love has grown
one who takes his time and
shows
love in gentle touches
hugs
and appreciation
where actions speak loud
and words compliment
I am going
on...
because this love
is where I belong

Thursday, March 1, 2012

The Creator

I was designed by the creator to be fearless.  I was designed to be strong.  I have no limits to my greatness.

the creator
the sculptor
the manipulator
made me to be
woman
graceful
with a sound mind
brave heart
and
courageous
at all cost
I find myself
mimicking
the creator
I want to shape you
I want to mold you
I want to manipulate you into being everything you think you are not
I want to give you the tools to build
a world
without doubt
the tools to call on your creativity
to create a masterpiece
I give you that
as I give you me
I am missing a few colors
but I have faith
and believe
that the creator
will paint me

Friday, February 17, 2012

Talking in his sleep

mumbling words
spoke a story
unheard
until now
as I lay there
trying to make out
the truth
for jumbled thoughts
and groggy tunes
told the tale
of infidelity
and I only found out
because he was taking in his sleep...

Monday, February 13, 2012

Rest in Peace...

There is really no appropriate title for this post as I am merely commenting on a Facebook post added by a friend of mine this week.

I am very objective and took no immediate offense to the post, but rather tried to consider the viewpoint of the poster.  The post read "Whitney Who?"

The photograph is at this link 
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=3008489463487&set=p.3008489463487&type=1&theater with this caption “America's fighting men and women sacrifice much to ensure that our great nation stays free. We owe a debt of gratitude to all our Military that have paid the ultimate price for this cause, as well as for those who are blessed enough to return from the battlefield unscathed.” Allen Boyd 

The photograph shows coffins of soldiers who have lost their lives in service to our wonderful country.  This was intriguing because it seems like we want to redirect focus to the servicemen rather than off of Whitney Houston's shocking death as if to devalue her death.  I, and I can only speak for myself, have not now and will never discredit the thousands of men and women who volunteer to fight for our country's safety.  I, not now and will never, devalue the devastation and tragedy of any type of loss.  I do not feel that by celebrating a life, of any kind, devalues the lives lost by those who serve our country.  I think that the post was immaturely represented in that it attempts to prioritize deaths.  Would you post this photo if an immediate family member died?  If your mother passed away would you post a photo of soldiers and say "Mother Who"?  I don't think anyone would because the loss is great.  And your attention and focus is on dealing with that loss.   You would never devalue your mother's death.

There are thousands of people who die everyday and no one even knows who they are.  Yet, people die everyday, innocent people, senselessly but we are not directly affected as sometimes we are unaware or have no direct or indirect relationship to those individuals.  It is not our place to pass judgement.  We can not fault people who have developed relationships with this vocalist.  Those who viewed her life as a testimony of strength and great faith.  No one in life is perfect by far, but her life and her music brought hope to many people.  Those who grew to know and love her music allowed her words, lyrics to directly affect their lives.  For all we know she could have saved lives through her words and her faith.  I do not think that by celebrating her life, that we can not also celebrate the lives of those who fight or have fought everyday for this country.

Now there were several posts/comments in the thread that I don't particularly agree and I won't respond to each individually but I will say that regardless to how someone dies, no one is absolutely perfect.  Many of the individuals on that thread are not perfect, but I would hate to hear what someone would say about you when you past away.   I would hope that they would not say that "you got what you deserved" or that "it was your fault".  Regardless that is not the reason for celebrating a life.  You celebrate the good things.   We are uncertain how many soldiers fight because they have nothing to lose, or whose to say that they don't devalue their own lives so they just fight with hope to die?  We are uncertain of those things just as we are uncertain of what Whitney Houston was actually going through but we remember her for all the great she has done and we remember those soldiers for the great things that they have done.

This post is not to attack anyone but to merely provide a more objective viewpoint and to voice an opinion.  

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Southern Belles, Fiction Novel, Synopsis


Southern Belles is a novel that takes readers on an emotional and dramatic journey into the lives, hearts and minds of a group of women who are true Southern Belles.  

Southern Belles is driven by the secrets of Jazzmine Phillips.  Jazzmine is originally from Chicago, but has lived in Texas for two years, in which she has developed a great friendship under the alias Alana Gaines with LaShelle, Natalie, Yolanda and Brittney.  When Jazzmine hit rock bottom, nearly being beaten to death, she fled Chicago and never looked back, determined to never let sex and money fuel desperation.  When Alana gets a feeling that she may have encountered a shady business deal, she calls on a friend from home to investigate.  Alana reluctantly discovers that LaShelles dedication to Slayton, is greater than any regard for Alanas best interest.

LaShelle, Shelle, age 30, is a woman of great knowledge but struggles with finding a balance between her professional, social and love life.  LaShelle is willing to do anything for the man she loves.  She is so blinded by love that it was inevitable that she would have to endure the consequences of being in a relationship with a notorious thug.

Natalie, Nat, age 25, spends most of her time climbing the corporate ladder, partying and seeking love.  Natalie has relations with three men; a man who doesnt really want to commit, a man who finally realizes that she is the one he wants and a man who she thought was willing to love her without obligation, through which she slowly discovers which gentleman truly has her best interest at heart.

Yolanda is a spoiled, unmotivated brat, who at the age of 28, still has no true goal for her life.  Yolanda lives at home with her parents in which she has no real responsibility.  Yolanda has acquired great education, at the expense of her parents, in hope to continue to receive their financial support.  She is perceived as naïve, but she always happens to be in the right place at the right time; because of that, she is able to shine light on a lot of things that have been going on right under the others noses.

Brittney, Britt, age 27, single handedly takes care of her son, Caleb, while running a very successful business and dealing with the trifling, selfish and freeloading man who fathered her child.  Brittney, so unhappy with the way her life was headed, leaves her babys father and jumps on a chance to be with her one true love, Maxwell Caleb Lawson, the man whom which she named her son after!   What Brittney thought would be a fairy tale ending turns into a nightmare.  Brittney finds out that everything that glitters isnt gold and there was a reason that she and Maxwell were not meant to be.

The Belles meet monthly; a time for each of them to reflect on their lifes journey, discuss issues and provide support for one another.  With this being a very dynamic group of women, the meetings can become unruly and not all the time do the ladies see eye to eye.

Southern Belles highlights the strength and determination southern women have for success.  Southern Belles seeks to promote self awareness, dignity and pride amongst women.  Southern Belles tells of how to succeed when faced with the inevitable aspects of life.

Who will persevere?  Whose life will end?  Will they remain friends?

Monday, February 6, 2012

Ode to Poetry

So my ability to speak poetically is easily summed up in a phrase, "When I lost courage to speak, I sought refuge in a pen and discovered a voice, poetically spoken."  I have for many years, and still believe, that this same drive is the essence of each post and poem you read.  In all my work I strive to give you me.  The "me" that you may not otherwise understand if you were not able to read.

So please make sure you let me know what you all think.

Here is a poem that I like to call "Ode to Poetry":

A tribute to
an old fashion love
a love that stands true
a golden dove
flying great altitudes
I sing new tunes
in your arms
curled up
with
pen and pad
in heaven again
I give you all of me
each emotion
and great memory
I need you to
summarize my journey
poetry
and we live forever
poetically
speaking
in phrases that enliven
with lyrics
a symphonic melody
I need you now
and forever
so my soul I give to you
that encompasses all of me
I love you always
to
poetry

Monday, November 14, 2011

Uninspired

So for awhile I have been uninspired, and I honestly can not figure out why.  For the longest time my greatest motivation and inspiration comes from wanting to make a difference in the world; to shake brains and provide consciousness to the consistently overlooked factors that hinder progress; to share my feelings of love and its power to affect (whether positive or negative).  And all I can do is continue to speak to you verbally and hope that the message speaks to you.  I can only hope that my passion creeps into you and sparks a fire that never dies.

The only way for me to get back in touch with my passion is to figure out why I fell in love in the first place.  I did that today.  I thought back to the beginning, when my soul was imparied and I felt that I had no where to turn.  When I felt that I had nothing, I sought refuge in a pen, and developed a voice poetically spoken.  Writing gave me breath.  I no longer had to wait to exhale.  I was no longer existing.  I learned from my mistakes, I could look back on the misery and challenge myself to be better.  My life became an example, a tutorial and I allowed myself to be read.

When I realized that I was not in this alone and there were others who shared the same views I wrote more for them.  I lived harder to share my stories.  I wanted to create a relatable journey, with no limits.  For I discovered that fear is the greatest factor in complacency and I despised it.  I wanted nothing but new experiences and I fought hard for it.  Always defying gravity, going against the grain and testing boundaries.  I didn't always make others happy, but I had to set my soul free in order to be beneficial to anyone around me.

Pain hurts but it is the best teacher.  No one wants to continuously relive pain.  Any sane human being will want to fight for better.  I hope that none of you are uninspired.  I am here to dispel all rumors, evil thoughts, and fear that has you binded to complacency.  That has you stuck in redundancy because you want to just "blend in".   God created chameleons for that.  He created you to matter, that is what you are made of.  Everything on this earth has a role, plays a part and their part matters.  You matter.

I wish I could rid us of all the negativity, and evoke positive thoughts in our blood streams, but that would just be to easy.  And anything worth fighting for is not worth having so, when I look back on my blogs, my literature and poetry in ten years; I need to be able to say I inspired clarity; that I turned on light bulbs that shined peace and serenity.
 


Wednesday, August 10, 2011

The Perfect Mate

Men are always so quick to say what they want or do not want in a woman, but what makes "a man" the know it all when it comes to finding a perfect mate?  I mean men can be pricks and some very single because they do not have the capacity to grasp the basics.  Yes women are naturally nurturing and emotional beings, but if it was not for our compassion and strength, a man, would not grace this earth.  We, women, are here to be fruitful and multiply.  We embrace woman hood and the capacity to give birth.  Ideally every woman would be able to understand that this is a true blessing, but everyone on this earth is not designed the same.  Some can withstand more than others because of mindset and its okay because the variance in individual personalities and capabilities make up diversity and no one really wants to be consumed in redundancy.   I mean what would the world be like if you could premeditate everything?  No spontaneity?  No surprise?

At any rate, women love men, period, naturally we are designed that way.  And just so I am clear, I am liberal, I take no offense to same sex marriages or partnerships, it is not my place to judge, but for the purposes of this article/post this is nearly my viewpoint and my relational interest as a heterosexual.  No disrespect intended.

So as a woman I want a man not afraid to show concern, when needed.  A man strong enough to admit his faults and confess his love and be better for the woman in his life.   A man that understands the heart of a woman is not a toy.  A man who takes ownership and handles his business.  We want the man not ashamed to love even when we have gained a few pounds.

I think is funny that men will go into detail about the woman he wants, what she should and shouldn't do, have or what she should and should not act like, but for a woman we are simple.  We love a man for that fact that we know his eye may wonder, or that his pride may interfere with what he is know he should or shouldn't do.  We accept that about you.  We will do our best to love and trust you but when you act out you leave us no choice but to do the same.

I just want men to understand that loving a woman is just as hard as loving a man and when you are overly demanding, insecure, jealous and prideful it hinders the love capability.  We just want to love you for who you are.  I just wish that instead of trying to define the "perfect mate" that we as men and women learn to love all of the things that make us fall in love.  Whether it is what would or wouldn't identify as the perfect mate.  We can love perfectly all of those things that surprises us.  That is what "falling in love" feels like.

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Trouble

So I think we will be in great trouble if we continue to allow our youth to be miss guided.  There, in my opinion, is a common misconception about the education of our youth and their ability to make sound decisions however they seem to be making the adults believe that they are more than capable.  Just so stubborn and hard to please, what should we do with these troubled teens? 

My concern stems from the fact that there are more followers than leaders in this younger generation.  In my generalization I find that today's teen want everything handed to them and sugar coated, as my parents would say.  Don't want to know what's right, just want to do what is right for now.  Selfish and self-centered we allow these to be the generation that our children will see.  The generation that our children will long to be.  

Unfortunately they assume that life is as easy as what they see on TV.  They are all thinking of "get rich quick" schemes.  Everyone wants to be a rapper, and actor or a model with no foundation or brains to follow.  I find myself trying to explain and provoke understanding amoungst this generation.  They must realize that even if they do happen to make the right connections and/or happen to get to a place they want to be, what will they do if their attitude, lack of professionalism and poor speech land them on their asses?  What will they do then with only one degree, a hope and a dream?

I think that it is important for us to educate them at all cost.  Work experience and an education go hand in hand.  Just because you have a degree that does not certify your common sense or your ability to comprehend the tasks at hand.  Doing and reading is two totally different things; but what do we know?  Can't help for being told to just "let them live" and "follow your dream"!  Not to discourage the message but to educate about what work ethic and dedication goes along with that.  EXPERIENCE is key.  I believe that some of them think they are going to talk their way to the top.  What are you with no common sense?  Where are you with no ethics?  Where are you with no education?  Where are you without any sort of foundation?  Questions that we should make sure to provide the answers to.

I wish that you consider Generation X (as I am on the cusp of X and Generation Y or the Millennials), I will refer to that generation as "WE" , so please take notice to the fact that we are very hard workers, we understand the value of "paying dues" and we are willing to take what we need to get to where we want to be.  We gain the experience.  Please now consider Generation Y, a generation of followers, just like homosexuality is an epidemic, not to take it away from those who have chosen to take that path, but consider how many are just following.  Please also consider Generation Y and their ability to lean and concentrate on achieving goals in the entertainment or music industry?  How many of them are actually participating in internships or working to support the dream?  Most are just blogging, YouTubeing (for lack of a better term) or solely dependent on the Internet.  I watched a series of videos on youtube where "twerking" is the new thing.  Although it is a form of dance, parents are not considering the message it sends for a 12-16 year old making a video, with underwear on, "twerking" and posting it on the internet.  There should be no question of why are children are getting raped, its because their inocence is being stripped because of what is avaliable via internet for them to view and mimic.  Just think, if the Internet failed/crashed tomorrow, what would they do?  How would they respond?  Would they still have the same aspirations?

Again, these are only things to consider, and this is only a generalization, I would never say it is solely fact because there are some exceptions to the rule and I believe that behavior and perception is dependent upon up bringing.  In my opinion most single parent children learn from an early age the struggle and want to make sure to give their all to make a different and/or change their surroundings.  In comparison to two parent homes, where most of the children are crutched through life and worry not about the small things; therefore they take advantage of almost everything.  That which deprives them of acquiring traits of persistence and dedication.  And if there is persistence and dedication it is not for the greater good it is more often than not for self preservation. And once again, it is a generalization so if it does not speak to you individually.

I think I fear that we are troubled because we are amoungst a generation who does not understand what it means to struggle.   Struggle brings about humility which feeds sincerity and drive. 

Monday, September 27, 2010

Something NEW

No longer waiting on those with planted feet
I am loosening the roots
Letting God up root me

New heights
New lengths
Bright lights
He makes
Doing away with
Old ways
Old logistics
Easy
Mind at ease
Peace enstilled
My heart can see
My soul can breath
Serenity is...
It is indeed.

I want something new
I need to make life meaningful
Hope the arms of my soul reach out to you
Let its illumination enliven you

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Innocent

So we are innocent until proven guilty, but if it is not proven what about me?  Why should I die when the hate wasn't for me?  Why would you risk removing life from this earth for the chance to get him or her?  Is it really that crucial?  I can't help but wonder everytime I think of these questions every time I think of lost loved ones.  Ask yourself how would you feel if you were surrounded in dirt six feet beneath the surface?

My heart goes out to the Innocent; those individuals lost by the hand of a drunken driver, the scorned lover or angered shooter.  I am not naive enough to hope for a perfect world, but I have enough
passion for life and a love for GOD that will allow me to hope and have faith that one day we will be able to not fear life because of the possiblity of someone else's inconsiderate actions.

As I lay here beneath the surface
I dwell on what was
The life I lived
The hearts that loved and longed for my presence

I cast not a curse on your name
Your life
Or your seed
But wish that you forever remember me

My last breath was at your hand
My last glipse of life was lost to your hate
A spirit unknown to you
And with my soul now traces your footsteps
I can only wish that I be the last
Make my memory your chance
Let us preserve
The Innocent

This was actually written in memory of Marsai Murray. 

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

The Love Trials

In order to be able to effectively recognize and grow in love one must experience a series of trials and learning experiences in the form of lovers.  Some people are just capable of accepting, delivering and recognizing love once.  They have to discipline to stay and work on perfecting it.  Others, like myself, learn from doing.  The more you experience, the more you learn and with that the love timeline is developed.  I just happen to believe that you will not find that one until you experience the following:

THE FIRST LOVE

The first love is the one you laid eyes on and knew you had to have, or you were caught off guard by the connection you uncontrollably developed.  In most cases he/she is the first crush or first lust.  That individual you develop your first connection with.  You gain confidence in yourself and in your relationship.  You become comfortable.   You build on likes and dislikes, but the connection of the soul is never developed.  This is your introduction to love, being in love is still foreign.


THE LESSON


Usually the first encounters are ridiculous.  You are embarrassed or he/she is nothing that you wanted ever.  But that one day you looked into their eyes and something about them melted you away. You wanted to give it a chance and you did, so you learned and grew in love with them.  The person that you bared much pain, put up with much and learned nothing until he/she was gone.  During this relationship you loved hard, but you loved wrong.  Still played by insecurities, could not love what you saw, always wanted to changed something.  Settled for much because you began to believe true love would never come.  The lesson occurs post relationship; kind of like an epiphany.  Light bulb goes off and you are over them.  No longer attracted to the individual.  Some people become friends with this individual, but most often they have the greatest affect.  It was because of them you found your place in and with love.   

HEART BREAKER

This person is usually the individual that you gave the most to.   You loved hard, gave your all and the two of you either did not see eye to eye or you allowed your feelings to guide.  Love is blind here.  You heard what you wanted, believed what you wanted skewed you perception of reality.  With the heart breaker you are naive.  All that you expected is all that you would never receive.  You long for all that you were not willing to give.  This in turn lead to heartbreak.  You are sadden because you gave your all (or thought you gave your all) and got nothing in return.  In some cases you may even experience great shame.  So, you decide to turn hurt into hatred to get over 'em.  But, they still affect you however, because every time you encounter this person your mind and body want them still, but your heart and soul divert.  So you know even though they still touch you in a way, you know it will NEVER work.  You decide that there is no need to experience HEARTBREAK twice.

THE TEST

This individual made you vulnerable to fast.  You feel in love because your mind allowed you to believe that you were on the same page.   The only thing is, you were in it alone.  It started out great, thought you had it all figured out.  Blamed yourself for that persons actions, experienced a great deal of reverse psychology.  Never what you expected, just happened and when it happened it was so good that you thought they were the ONE.  Not really!  Just a facade because this person usually uses you in the TEST the way you used the THE LESSON to bounce back from THE FIRST LOVE THE TEST is just to show you how it feels.


THE SOUL MATE

One look in the eyes, that subtle touch, "me toos" and soul tunes on the same station.  Love like nothing you would ever think you would experience, fairy tail shit.  Unselfishly you gave and expected nothing in return.  It's so funny how easy love turns to being in love and you did not force it. This person is the ONE, for lack of a better term.  This person is someone you encountered when you are mentally ready to embark on the journey.  You lived hard and loved harder; you learned and longed for this individual so you vowed that when you found them that you would do right.  No one could make you harm this person.  There was no one that would stand in the way.  This is that person whom makes you warm, soft, and emotional.  Love made perfect, and you love all the imperfections.  Feel heat even when you here them pissing...Its real.  The MATE for the SOUL; all loves trials have unfold your true destiny.   And now all the tales every told about being in love, make sense.

Monday, April 19, 2010

Stop Tryin...

Some people think they can and will understand everything.  That to me is a bit farfetched.  I happen to feel that there are a great deal of things that we will be unable to comprehend until we are ready to allow ourselves to face the truths that come with understanding.

The way I piece together my words sometimes you think you have it or me figured out and you don't even know what I am saying.  I mean he is not always actual, love is always factual because I live by, with and through it, but the struggle is not always mine.  I want you all to get the message and not try to read me.  My mind is so complex hell sometimes I dont even get me, but that is life.  I make due with what I am at any given moment.

I ask that you stop trying...I mean really just stop trying to understand me and comprehend the words.  Interpret them as they speak to you, let your heart be heard.  I am sure as you read something stirs, so you can do either one of two things, (1) you ignore the rational to hear what you have already deemed appropriate or accurate or (2) take it as it is given.  Make the situation your own and apply the situation to your story.  In order to understand me, you have to you have to understand you!  Whatever comes to mind when you read the lines, take that and make it your own.  And then, let me know how it moves you!

I want to here from you...

Monday, February 1, 2010

Funny how things change...

So, I told myself over and over and over again that I was focused.  Focused on me now.  I couldn't, I wouldn't let anyone deter me from the goal...a better me.  But it's so funny how things change.  It is so funny how emotions and feelings have a way of creeping in.  And I, woman first, and me second, have no choice but to allow them to guide.  I am feelings and they are the basis of my pride, or the lack there of.  I wish I could battle it.  I wish I had the heart of metal to conquer it, but it feels too damn good.  I can help this.  I want him more now.  More than I would ever allow myself to show.   I crave him now and so I hold back more.  I can't believe this shit.  I can't believe he did, or is doing a number on me.  FUCK!  What now?  I guess I have to swallow the pride and let love guide, better yet...


I want you more now

And I didn't know how to express this shit
You want more of me so you never quit
You make it known where your heart sits
I hear the sighs
I want to whisper them away
I never told you
But if you want to make this work
I won't stray
I swear at this point
It's working in your favor
All insecurities
Any jealousy
I long to comfort it
I will take you to a place
They will never exist
I want to be the company that you feel is heaven sent
And
It's so hard to put words on this
It's so inexplicable
As our hearts yearn
To eliminate the distance
We want to relate
And I want you to stay
Yet
I still have fear of it
I hope all goes well
Because
At this point
I can't turn back
I want to make forever with you prevalent
Let’s just hope your presence is dominant
May they fade away
And
You become prominent

And damn it's funny how
Just yesterday
I longed to
Be me
Love me
And let love pass me
To be more focused on me
But maybe it's time
And if that is what it is
I accept it
So
I will allow love
If it's meant
And I hope it is
Because it's so funny how
Yesterday I wasn't
And today I am having trouble fighting it

Sometimes all that I can not say, my poems say for me.  I just wish that today could be the future and yesterday history.  Life has its pace and God has his will; but I just want to make you feel, the way I do in the absence of all that is physical. 

Can you relate?