Another View....

Looking for another view...

www.theverticalperspective.blogspot.com

I wrote that too!

Enjoy!

Neon Collars....

I love to see brilliant people doing wonderful things.

I am an advocate of music. I love what it can be...and everyone's take on it. How they interpret the bass, snare, keyboard, vocals, etc and make it golden.

NEON COLLARS, a Houston Band whom I do not believe to not be genre specific but they are, for lack of a better phrase, "off tha chain". The sound is sultry and the lyrics are Godsend. Just listen... Neon Collars is nothing like anything I have ever heard before. It has been a long time since I have witness music so pure. The crowds response was something to experience. The lyrics and music move you to a place where nothing matters. You are free and fear nothing. And that was evident in the faces and responses of the crowd participants.

I find myself now solely encompassed in the NEO SOUL genre because it is so overlooked. More popular now, but it is crazy to see people jamming groups, bands and solo artist now that I have been jamming for months or even years in some cases.
Just in case you are unaware...I will list a few artist that are really great but not getting as much Mainstream air time:

Conya Doss
Jaguar Wright
Amel Larrieaux
Anthony David
Eric Roberson
Emily King
Rashaan Patterson
and of course Neon Collars

These are just a few, but their music is full of individualism and passion. You can't help but enjoy it. And granted you will not be able to relate to or even enjoy every single record, but you will find great music on all of their many cds.

Thoughts...

You can't put a price on happiness. It comes from within. You don't have to be rich to afford it or broke to adore it...It is self reliant. I own my happiness; I believe in me and my accomplishments. I own my future and make light of it. Success takes time, patience and persistence. You have to make it...How bad do you want it????

More Randomness!

I like to think that we are all confident in ourselves enough to not want to constantly seek perfection but to realize the imperfect perfectness of ourselves. Yes the wording is a little off, but you understand what I mean. I feel exactly the same. And I did not do it because I wanted to be more or to feel more secure, because quite frankly I think that my confidence was more fierce when I had them. Now they are gone and I am trying to find the difference. I have always seen myself for who I was. I have always wanted nothing more but to love me and allow others to do the same. I feel regular, but why? Shouldn't I feel better? I am less agitated but nevertheless I am still me. I escaped them finally, a breath of fresh air...I love it, but no one loves me more...or will he? Now that my they are gone will he want me? This is ridiculous to think, but is it true? Did he only see them? Is that why he shunned away? I don't know, but I do not want to be the character in this book...so insecure with self that she was abused emotionally and physically. I do not want to settle. Hell I give myself and love myself the best...No one but God can do better than me. I am not looking for him to complete me, but simply compliment me. Why when you think you have finally found him, he doesn't allow it to be? I need someone who is not afraid to love, who is not afraid to let us be...He adores me, and I see it in his touch. In his eye, he adores me. Never seen that look before in my life yet we will never be because we are too scared to take a chance. I am not scared but I feel like I have already failed so there is no sense in going back now. I will wait until he comes for me, or is he thinking the same thing? No one knows...That is why we are still pondering...the options.

Presidential Inauguration 2009

Nineteen degree weather was not enough to keep millions of Americans away and it definitely was not enough to deter me. As we awaited the initiation of this historical event, our minds fiercely battled our physical resistance to continue to stand and endure the Inauguration of the 44th President of the United States of America, Barack Hussein Obama.


I had the pleasure of experiencing this monumental occurrence with millions of Americans differing in race, religion and creed. We gathered in peace, shared uncontrollable emotions and smiles for we all shared a common passion. The passion of witnessing the United States of America grow; witnessing this countries founding principles emphasized. We shared the feelings of finally believing that We, The People, of the United States of America can effect change in this country. We stood together to witness the promise, as President Obama vowed, in all sincerity, to guide this country out of recession, and to encourage Americans to call upon our ability to effect and encourage change. Through President Obama’s words he spoke of change but with that came the harsh realities of past decisions. As Obama states in his inaugural address, “Today I say that the challenges we face are real. They are serious and they are many. They will not be met easily or in a short span of time. But know this America-they will be met.” These words, spoken in confidence, sincerity and adoration restore the hope that always resided in American hearts submerged by fear. We shall clasp to these words in desperate times. We believe in our President’s promise and that is why this Presidential Inauguration drew such a crowd.



“Our challenges may be new. The instruments with which we meet them may be new. But those values upon which our success depends — hard work and honesty, courage and fair play, tolerance and curiosity, loyalty and patriotism — these things are old. These things are true. They have been the quiet force of progress throughout our history. What is demanded then is a return to these truths. What is required of us now is a new era of responsibility — a recognition, on the part of every American, that we have duties to ourselves, our nation, and the world, duties that we do not grudgingly accept but rather seize gladly, firm in the knowledge that there is nothing so satisfying to the spirit, so defining of our character, than giving our all to a difficult task.”

-President Obama-

The strength of heart and character of America was defined by the many individuals whose physical stamina demolished over the hours and were involuntarily forced to retreat.




With President Obama’s encouragement tears were shed with hope of prosperity for all. President Obama’s heartfelt presence etched great cheer in the hearts of millions. And even though we stood ten, hundreds, thousands of feet and watched miles away, we felt like we stood right by his side.




www.teenchicmag.com

It's Worth It.....

It was worth it...an hour out of my day made my heart smile for weeks. I made it up to him. Gave him the respect and honor he lacked through her. Made him hot inside because he heard the truth and it gave him hope. Things will be better. We deserve better.

I am grateful for second chances; second advances to 3rd base. And that is not the sex base. That is reality's fate. I made it. I never would have thought it would have been this soon, but he is willing and I am giving it my all. Commitment to be true to forever; making the most of our heart's desire. Just to smile with soul's enlightment, shining bright in it. And in the abscence we grow insecurities for no reason. We both feel the same. Can't wait until someone makes the first move...someone get courgage to...admit to adoration. I miss him. And I want to be near him. He desires me without saying, so I move away. Fearful of femininity, those woman qualities that attrack, disrtact and redirect their focus. I need him to be there. I can't go out on this limb and he not be there. What does that feel like? I don't want to know. I do however, need to know where this will go. I don't want to move to fast. This is the prime and mistakes are made in haste. I have nothing but time to wait on fate. God-fearing man who's humble, much humility. My heart calls out to you. Will you answer it? I hope so.

Random Thoughts....

There is no man or woman that is perfect. I like to think I am a genuine, straight forward person with good intentions. Maybe someone you may first meet and immediately assume I am cocky and rude...You may even go as far as telling all your friends, "I hate that Bitch." Sometimes that is how it is, but in all honesty I try my best to do right by others. My actions show that I am secure in myself but never at the expense of someone else. I have great confidence in myself without having to feel that I am better than everyone else. I am me and I love me and that is all I worry about.

My heart cries out to those who are less fortunate than myself. Hell with this economy I am a few bricks away from broke myself. We can always help someone else. Small gestures are just as great as the grand ones. Sometimes listening can be better than giving. We need to not be judgemental of others personal situations. We all suffer consequence; it is just in a differing forms.

On another note...I feel like honesty is the best policy. No matter how bad it hurts. I would never give someone else something I would not want for myself. Tell me this....Would you rather lie to someone and be unsettled with guilt for 10 years or tell the truth and be the bad guy for a day (at the max)? I know every choice comes with consequences but I would rather you live with mine for a few seconds. Yes as a child I commonly received the "listen and think before you speak" criticism; which in turn made me feel misunderstood, but I get it now. Sometimes somethings are better left unsaid...until that person is ready to hear the truth. Some people do not face reality like others; especially when you want to believe your own reality. We all do it. I do in certain situations; which is probably common for most...and that instance is LOVE. We always turn our dreams into realities. Try to always see the positive and block out the negative possibilities, i.e. you know when he/she is cheating, you know when they are keeping secrets, on that down low shit etc... But when we love someone we just ignore it. It's easier for those on the outside to criticize and judge and say what they would or would not do until they are in the situation and blind sided by the consequences. The emotional hardship and in some case the physical hardship. Then it hits you...clarity and we see reality for what it is; we call ourselves fools in love and move on.

OK so this post was random, but I hope it has brought on clarity and given unwanted knowledge to some.

Emotional Return

It's so funny how small encounters can make you feel important. Make you smile just to know someone is thinking past the present. Placing everything into perspective, the long term goal. That is when hearts are rewarded. It is not with the physical gifts but the emotional returns.

I live to make you feel better
etch smiles in your hearts
like fifth grade love letters
we long for love
always want to be admired
tearing down walls
in situations where they matter
expecting its presence
in every aspect of life
hopeful

even though some live to disappoint
can't live with much trust
it's just taken for granted
developing scorn
and another one is lost
another one easily relinquishing to circumstance
made you feel good
so you gave it a chance
hate the truth so you make your own
it's ok to be gullible
so the smiles depreciate
the value of peace
is now less than one cent
it is encountered at the cost of your innocent

now mocked
and ridiculed because you want to hope for it
the love you longed for
now so far in the distance
and you still don't get it
peace is within
it's what you make of it


Don't search the world for what you have in you...Be at peace with self and everything will fall into place for you.

Presidental Inaugration 2009

Please check out my article on www.teenchicmag.com

More versions of this article and different perspectives coming soon..........

The Presidential Inaguration 2009

So few have the opportunity to witness such a historical event; and I thank GOD that I am one of those lucky people. Not only will I get to witness this history first hand, but I will get to witness the swearing in of the first African American President of the United States. Chosen by the American body. This is definitely going to be memory that I get to share with my children and I can not wait. I was hungry for the tickets so I got them. Never fall short of your true desire. Do whatever it takes, within reason, to do what you want and get where you want to be. Make your life meaningful. Life is never promised, so live day to day without fear and regret. I can not wait to return to tell you my experience, life from Washington, DC...Are you ready for it?

Poetry vs Reality

So the line or separation between poetry and reality isn't definite. It's ultimately what you make of it. I mean it's greater than humans; it's minute compared to government policies and procedures. The level of complexity is comprehensible by the average; I mean it's border line common sense. Poetry is transcribed to evoke feelings. Some truthful and some mythical but poetry nonetheless; always serving its purpose. If it's good.

I like to see words, live, think and be words. Getting to know them far beyond the bare minimum. I care what they mean to you. How you view them; if tears can really be stimulated by them, and if the verse you read is truly inspired by them. There is a huge difference between poetry that is written with words and poetry that is inspired by words. It's the placement and the meaning. Again the feeling you can take from it is totally different. Words and feelings, poetry in a nutshell. Reality and reason...living through stories we tell through verse. The difference between poetry and reality is special. The stories can be true; that's why the feelings overtake you. Just because its reality may not be true for the the writer doesn't mean it's not true for you, who which it was inspired. I see its effect on you and noted it. That's why you can easily relate to it. It's a better brand, maybe one step above generic, because it's comprehensible. Personally speaking poets poetically seek your connection. So I have probably confused you, but just like the evening news, poetry easily consumes you.

Corporate America

Well, at first it seems so hard to get into. You go to college to learn something new, only to find out that this thing you have devoted at least four years of your life to, has nothing to do with the job given to you. Pissed...you work your way up; acknowledging that the odds of you getting the pay your deserve for the degree you have earned is slim to none. There are circumstances where you catch the hook-up; which then turns out to be stressful because you have a great deal to live up to. But you do it. And despite what they think, or lip behind you; you are not token; your credibility is better than that of the average. You create the Shock factor. They don't know what to do; so they unwillingly accept you. Although they are making six figures in the lat 50s and 60s; they regretfully admit that you are subsequent. Except a few years shy of their careers. Then your promotions come without warning and they don't regret their decision because your focus and precision get narrower. You have tunnel vision. Focused on that million; because your family grew up eating bologna and Top Ramen,so you are determined to make a difference. You carry yourself in a way that has the wondering if your parents already had a million. It throws them off. You smile because your comfort kicks up a notch. You are successful in your own right. Promotions equal more money which indirectly means more responsibility. Cause success does not necessarily equal stress free. And your managers lessen. You are climbing...and you are glad you made it happen. Ten years later and you still are in your prime...SHINING! As you look back, you have to reach back and pull someone else in. Now it's time to step aside so they too can win. Aren't you glad you got in...Corporate America.

A Love Letter

So I didn't know where else to put it, so I blogged it. My last letter to him. My last letter to love because I give up on him. Even though I don't want to, I have to because love doesn't love me. Everything I thought love was, it wasn't. And this is almost like Sid's love letter to hip hop; the only difference is this, hip hop doesn't love me in return. Love is borderline pathetic, no I take that back, it is ridiculously pathetic. Like the thin line that stands between me and love when I cross it, I won't go back. But I stand in front of it weighing my options. And this post contradicts some of the others, but I am human also. My feelings waiver. No, I don't really want to give up on love, but it hurts so bad. The memories hurt because I can't live new ones everyday. I can't smile at him everyday.  He won't look at me like that everyday. With that sparkle that I know only I get, but I am nothing if he never admits it. I can't continue to hope for love, I just want it to one day chase me. Hound me until I give in, because I deserve it. I love love but he needs to work for it. So, I am here; tip toeing around my decision. Maybe you could help me out...Should I do it. Cross it and NEVER look back? HELL NO, I would be sad and deplorable; just like the line I drew, created, made up to validate my frustrations and anger. I hate this position. I want and need love. I want and need him. And one day love will chase me, hound me everyday until I give in. Until my fingers get tired of reflecting my thoughts of joy on this screen. I will succeed and love will love me; just like hip hop loved Sid, it may just take ten more years.


Brown Sugar, a Classic! My favorite movie by the way!

I Want To Give...

Just a little background history, before people think I am crazy, I came up with this poem in the shower. No paper, no pen, no laptop. I just happened to remember it, and typed it up to share with you. Hope you enjoy.


I almost want to give you more
I am a beast at this freestyle verse
I could stand in front of you
And wow you with this
This flow that is never broken
Until an applause is abundant
And I am so in love
I can’t stop
Can’t pause
Can’t let you go
My audience
I want to give you more
More of me
Of my time
My experience
My perception of reality
Its so real
You can’t help but to feel me
And that’s why I will never leave

I almost want to sleep on this stage
Breathe in the jazz
That sets the atmosphere
For truth speak
And its here
But I don’t need it
My verse is strong enough that I don’t need the antics
The song
The music
The theatrics
But its here
And you probably didn’t even hear it
Until I mentioned it

I almost want to give you
Eternity in rhyme
But I am going to end it
The longer I stay
The more you desire to live it
Feel it
Hear it
And the more I want to give it
So I must
Leave you with this
My heart
My life
I live like this
To speak
And give strength
To you
In my verse I love
And that’s all I can give
Marinate on it
Cause I am still going
And the applause is in you
So that means
That even though I don’t want to
Now
It’s time to leave you

NEW BEGINNINGS!

So I am ready for 2009!!! I am ready for the new challenges, love, joy, sorrows etc. I have had as many ups and downs as I can handle this year and look forward to the new. I hope your year was as eventful as mine. Full of life experiences and lessons that force you to acknowledge your mistakes and learn from them. I am older now, and I will not allow myself to make the same ridiculous mistakes. I have learned a great deal from love. And know what to value in a man. I am glad for a new chance to get to make better choices. Second chances. I am glad I have been allowed a few of them. Lord knows I need them. Thanks for allowing me to see who my true friends are, how important family is and when and being able to recognize the difference between potential greatness and bullshit.

I am aware now that a lot of choices made were because I was naive; not willing to learn from others. Wanting to fall and pick myself up. I have come to terms with the fact that I can not live my life doing everything someone else didn't or couldn't do. I want to live my life for me; knowing I tried and whether I come to face success or defeat; I know that no matter what I still did me. And I seized the opportunity to be true to me.

I wish all of you a very Happy New Year!!

I CAN'T HELP IT!

I can't help but be vulnerable to love. I can't help that despite the fact that I was developed with the capacity to restrain myself from enduring the confusion and the hurt brought by man, I refuse to allow that to keep me from loving. And he refused to allow confusion keep me from him. He said one thing but would show me another. He said he wouldn't care if I left, but he thinks about me in my absence. Continuously allows me in; into his world, even after I hurt him. Regardless of what he says, when you wholeheartedly do not want someone to be apart of your life you omit them. I did the same thing with someone else and I don't think about him; won't answer when he calls or entertain him. It is over, moved on from him. But if there was an ounce of hope that once I cleared my confusion, I would want him, he would still be here. And I would always accept the love given by him. Because he is real. Those who we hurt and still linger show us that the love is real. And once you get your mind right, you will spend the rest of your life making it up to them; because you knew where to turn when you were in search of...True and innocent it is; the love they have for you. And that is where I am...lingering. Hoping he will disperse the confusion lingering amongst his sight. Not his eye sight, but love sight. Guided by feelings not vision; allowing them to show him it's ok to live through his hearts desire. Free of fear. Not just calling on it when it is convenient; but willing to accept it even when it's difficult. So again I say, I can't help it. And I don't want to. I love him and this feeling is remarkable. A fool I am but willing to admit; moving on is easy when you are ready for it. I am not. I can't help loving him. I try to see the positive and even that is not enough to get me through. Why can't we recognize sincerity? Why mock it or mistreat it? No good reason or explanation besides selfishness. And even in that instance, I can't help it. I selfishly want to endure a love that can't possibly exist. His love for me is intangible; to far from his grasp. And there it will stay until he is willing to reach for it. There I linger because I refuse to help it.

DIR........

So, I am midway through the completion of my second poetry book and I just wanted to give you a little incite. Just so you all know that this collection is in reverse. The beginning is at the end and the present is in the beginning. It shows my growth in life and loves manifestations. Why I am now and why I am no longer what I was. The poetry in this book, in relationship to my previous collage, is fearless, strong, real and sincere. I put my heart on the line and I allowed it to be examined. I basically said this is me, fuck it...because real can never be denoted. It is what it is and you learn to love it. I can not wait to be able to give you a sample, but I really did go all out. Tried new verse structure, experiemented with haiku and I even researched some pieces.
I hope you enjoy it. I can't wait to share it with you!

Teen Chic Magazine!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Between December 2008 and January 2009 please look out for the hottest Teen Magazine around; Teen Chic Magazine.

Teen Chic Mag is an online magazine that informs, encourages and empowers teens around the world.

Magazine Staff Include:


Editor & Chief: C’na Roberts

Creative Director: Latasia Turner

Fashion Editor: Chanteau Garrett

Entertainment Editor: Mical J. Roy

Health & Beauty Editor: Stephanie Catchings

Feature Writers: Shawna G.
Audreyanna G.
Madison J.



This magazine is destined for great things. We need your support. The Magazine website is as follows:

www.teenchicmag.com

Go and check it out.

Teen Chic will be at Fashion Week in NYC this February and we also have writers attending the Presidential Inauguration! Please look forward to the articles and please join our blog.

Some people fear solitude. I smile at it! Because sometimes, self is much more supportive, more sensitive, more understanding than most people. They can be so negative sometimes I think it is better to enjoy YOU. I love relaxing in long, candle lit baths, listening to music, going to a movie or reading a great book! I can dine alone and go to the mall alone; I really believe if you always have to be with someone, you are codependent.

Just take a glance over the last two or three months of your life….How many times have you had a gang of people around to do things you could simply do alone?

Most are afraid of solitude because it really forces a closer look at reality! I love life and the realness of it. It is all in the way you look at something. If you are fearful or you think fear, you will be scared. If you think sad, you will be sad. The best quote I ever heard in my life, I was in the 5th grade. Granted I can not remember the person who said it, only that he was a famous old president, but he said, “It is a choice to be sad.”

Choices are a large part of life. Do not get made at the choices you make. Some are great and some we regret. It is always better to enjoy the wise choices and acknowledge all those that were made in error and to learn from them then. If you think you are horrible or your life is horrible and something bad is always happening to you, that is then what your life becomes; a series of bad events. And it all stems from your personal choices. Especially when all you look at is the negative.

I suggest, we Live to learn. Learn to live loving.

How Funny...

How funny
Thinkin’ that I am head over
What do they say “Hills”
Not hills
Ok maybe rocks
Still just a few steps ahead
But you encourage
Me to you
Subconsciously sought
Yet
The closer we get
You retreat
Therefore
I keep
A team
Just like you
And maybe
Just maybe you realized
You don’t have shit on me
I
Your match
A beast
And I
Don’t need to be lied to
Or dealt with like the other
Cause quite frankly
That is you
And you probably feel the same as I do
But I will never put my heart on the line for you
You don’t even trust that the sky is blue
I will never be able to show you
Truth
As I see it
As I live it
And it’s beyond tangible
It’s experimental
Risky
That is what love is
And until you can honor it
You will keep
Thinkin’ of me
In your spare time
Thoughts driftin’
Cause your wrong
And guilty conscious is eatin’
But you keep seekin’
Fame
Instead of embracing wealth
You want that cheap shit
It looks good
Until you
Try it
Taste it
Use it
Or buy it
Then it shows its worth
I never had to prove
You know when shit is priceless
So
You know
That I am
Valuable enough to
Be the MRS.